Tuesday, August 20, 2013

The less glorious side of coaching

Good grief, am I glad I don’t coach. Coaches have it rough like a kite searching for a strong breeze on a serene afternoon.

On a daily basis they have to deal with preseason paperwork before anyone can play. How easy do you think it is to gather signed forms that are completely filled out from say 15 cross country runners or 50 football players?

“Hey, son, is that bottom line signed? Did you put down the date? What about this line up here, don’t forget that.”

And let’s see, coaches have the illustrious duty of doling out equipment, and that’s a nightmare, especially in football.

“Helmets, check. Shoulder pads, check. Hold on, that helmet is too big and this one needs more air and that one is missing the cushion that goes around the ear. OK, helmets, check. Shoulder pads, well, hey, we might move him to linebacker this year so make sure No. 56 grabs some of the bigger shoulder pads.

“Wait, No. 13 and No. 15 are fighting over who gets the No. 1 jersey? Which one should get it? I don’t care. Conditioning drills start in an hour. I don’t have time to worry about a number.”

But of course they eventually do.   

Sure, a head coach can hand off duties like figuring out which cornerback needs a chin strap or where somebody lost their shin guards, but the train isn’t moving until everything is set.

And by train, I mean practice, you know just that place where games are won (and lost). Where one team gets better and another only shuffles its feet for two hours. Want to know who’s going to have a good football team or which soccer program is the best? Attend a practice. Watch the kids work, how the coaches interact with the players and compare how Program A utilizes its time versus Program B.

Oh wait, the new No. 1, the guy coach slotted into the starring role of the offense can’t practice today because he forgot his paperwork. Shoot, he was only concerned with nabbing that No. 1 jersey.

Idaho high school coaches, how do you do it? How do you balance the day job with coaching? How do you find the time to meet with assistants to discuss if that promising sophomore is indeed that promising but still develop a practice plan, gather all that darn paperwork, fix the practice equipment, find your whistle, talk to the media, eat and sleep?

And, coaches, if you’re thinking to yourselves, “Yeah, he’s right. I am busy. If I could just eliminate some of the fluff like talking to the media my life would be way easier,” forget about it.

If only because the preseason is the best time to talk to coaches. Silly media polls are coming out soon, everybody’s win-loss records are dead even and the future is limitless. Talking to coaches in the preseason is the best.

Because before the action starts, preseason possibilities feel so good.

Team didn’t win a game the year before? So what, 2013 is a new day.

Suffer a terribly excruciating, eye-gougingly painful loss to a bitter rival one year ago? So what, 2013 is a new day.

Lose every single good player on the team from a year ago except No. 1, and that guy can’t even remember his paperwork? So what, 2013 is a new day.

2013 is the season Team A continues its legacy as the best squad in Idaho.

2013 is the season when Team B reverses its fortunes of the past — fortunes that consistently dictated losing seasons — and has a year to remember.

2013 is the season Team C avoids having to rebuild with a small senior class and reloads with a pack of unproven but capable juniors.

2013 is the season Team D finds a way to overcome its greatest weakness and achieve the ultimate goal that’s always just evaded its grasp.

And 2013 is the season every single coach and player ends the year as undefeated champions on top of the universe (or at least Idaho).

Oh, and 2013 is the season I’ll stop misspelling names, screwing up statistics and ruining leads. I think we can all root for that.

So here’s to the 2013 high school preseason, where enthusiasm runs unchecked, dreams remain alive, injuries are non-existent and win-loss records stand untarnished.

Better yet, here’s to the 2013 season that’s literally at our doorstep. The time when those dreams are shattered except for the lucky few, injuries destroy seasons and records rarely turn out as hoped.

And here’s to the coaches who guide their teams through it.

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